I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize