My nipple is on Facebook.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
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