did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
