I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
