Christians are straight up FREAKS
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Come see our sink grown plant.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
