what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
