Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
