I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
