she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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