If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
