Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
