tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
