So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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