Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
