Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
