You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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