marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
