Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
