I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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