It was confusing and full of hummus
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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