Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i came on her dog
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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