Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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