NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Someone signed my nipple.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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