I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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