OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
