we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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