Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
