Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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