Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
