he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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