Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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