The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
