Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
