You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize