Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
