when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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