can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
