when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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