I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
did i just pee glitter
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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