I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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