The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
