So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
