Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
