they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize
