"it" just moved
My hand turned me down
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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