home. puking in laundry basket.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
