If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
