i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
