I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
