I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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