Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
