I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
