She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
